Part 1: The Quest

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Something’s wrong.”

“Nothing.”

“I’m looking at your face and you’re miserable, so something is wrong.”

Nothing!

Part 2: The Guessing Games

“Is it the black flask?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t like it?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Nothing.”

“Well you have to use it. You broke the two others ones and I don’t get paid until next week.”

“Fine.”

Part 3: The Climax

“You still look upset.”

“I’m fine.”

“You are not fine. I’m looking at your face and you are not fine.”

“It’s nothing.”

*Groan* “Is it the blue sweater?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t like it?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Nothing.”

“You just said you don’t like it! You can’t dislike your sweater because of nothing!?!”

“It’s the wrong colour.”

“No it’s not. It matches your uniform perfectly.”

“I can wear pink.”

“The teacher said no pink. Utakatazwa.”

“Inaninyonga.”

“Uwongo.”

“I just don’t like it.”

“Why?”

“Just.”

*russumfussumstupidsweater*russumfussumpoutysilence*

“Okay, what’s the real reason?”

“My friends laugh at me. They say I look like a baby in that sweater.”

*Sigh* “Would you rather be laughed at or freeze to death?”

“Freeze.”

*GOD!!* “Okay fine, wear the other blue sweater.”

*russumfussummumbemumble*

“Oh what now?!”

“Nothing.”

*Sigh*russumfussumherewegoagain*Double Sigh* “You don’t like it?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Nothing.”

“WHY?!?!”

“Nothing.”

*russumfussumifyousaynothing onemoretimei’ll…* “You can’t say you don’t like it because of nothing.”

“Inaninyonga.”

*Sigh*

The genesis of my morning bluesy war with Princess is that I forgot to wash her favourite school sweater, so she needs substitute, and she doesn’t like anything on offer. Or maybe it’s just PMS, who knows. But after that exchange, she tried to pacify me by asking for an extra slice of bread. [She’s a lousy eater, so asking for seconds = one happy mummy.] She declared that I’m very good at paka-ing Blueband. Except the slice in question had jam. She then curled up in a corner of the sofa for a power nap while we waited for the school bus to come.


Yes, she wore the offending sweater. I can’t be sure she didn’t yank it off as soon as she got inside the bus. Now, three things:

  1. There are days when I wish my little girl was a little less like me.
  2. I have a whole new respect for dudes who put up with this nonsense every day. How many times can a girl say ‘nothing’ before you dump a heavy bucket on her head?
  3. My gorgeous angel baby girl is going to give some poor sod hell someday. If he lives, I will gladly pay him dowry. If he lives.



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