Being of the TMI persuasion, I find statements like this quite intriguing. For the longest time, I’ve had this theory that people hold a certain image of me, and that once they meet me and realize I’m not that way at all, they run away. It surprises me that anyone would get the wrong idea about me, since my life is – quite literally – an open blog. But then again, what you say (or write or tweet) isn’t always what people hear.

There have been countless articles about why male-female relationships are so messed up. Most of them blame feminism and gender equality. They say women have taken over male roles, so the guys don’t know what to do with themselves. They say a girl earns money, pays bills, and raises children on her own, so a part of her feels she doesn’t need a man, even though her woman-parts often crave one.

As for the girls, we often get upset by the double standards. A woman today can do pretty much anything a guy can, but she gets victimized for trying. She can drink and drive with the best of them, but when she ‘acts like a man’ she’s considered a slut. A girl that asks a guy out is labelled desperate. One that shows sexual intent is labelled loose.

Meanwhile, the guy says he feels emasculated by these ‘independent women’. They say no matter how modern and self-reliant you are, the best way to get a guy is to go back to your roots, hide your brilliance, humble yourself, lie about your salary. They say a man loves a woman of mystery, a girl he can’t quite figure out, a girl that plays hard to get but knows the thin line between modesty and impossible achievements, because if you’re too unattainable, they give up and chase something they’re more likely to catch.

They say a man loves to chase, and that you’ve got to give him something to run after. Make it too easy and he’ll go hunting for fresh meat. This suggests that no matter how good you are to chase, once he catches you, he’ll just get up and go chase something else. Unless, of course, you have some secret trick or magic potion to keep him running forever. For example, if he feels like he constantly has to ‘earn’ your affection, he’ll be chasing you for years. Or maybe he’ll get frustrated and find someone more appreciative.

I know a girl who even after 12 years of marriage never ever calls or texts her man because ‘a man likes to chase’. She loves him, but maintains an almost aloof demeanour, just to keep him on his toes. He can’t figure her out, and doesn’t know quite what she’s about, which keeps her attractive in his eyes. So in theory, if you can just keep a guy guessing, even after being his wife for 15 years and bearing six of his kids, he’ll be too excited and pre-occupied to chase anything else.

I guess my real question is … how do you keep them chasing? You’d have to live in a way that keeps him constantly curious, especially when there’s absolutely nothing to be curious about. You have to seem to be hiding ‘stuff’ even when there’s nothing there to hide. And you have to do it in a way that makes you alluring, as opposed to – you know – him wondering what you’re scheming behind his back. You basically keep up the early parts of the dating game throughout your relationship, which – incidentally – is what every wife wishes her man would do.

That sounds like an awful lot of work to me, which is probably why guys get upset when we ask them to do it. It makes sense in theory though, because once you’ve been together for a while, you know everything about each other and the mystery is gone. Some people claim you start to look alike, and to see each other as siblings rather than lovers. Then unless his character just won’t let him cheat, he can use familiarity and boredom as an excuse to chase some nubile young thing.

I suppose some things will never really change. Women, no matter how modern and independent they are, will want a man to take care of them and protect them. Guys, no matter how intelligent and refined they are, will want a girl of mystery they can chase. And relationships will always be made through sheer hard work, and will only succeed if both parties have the same goals for the union, put in a vast amount of effort, and agree to work things out no matter [who or] what gets in their way.

♫ Amazing ♫ Blue October ♫

126 thoughts on “Mwanaume ni effort, mwanamke ni …”

  1. Great post however , I was wondering if you could write a litte more on this topic? I’d be very grateful if you could elaborate a little bit further. Many thanks!

  2. I have come to understand that charges for on-line degree professionals tend to be an excellent value. Like a full Bachelors Degree in Communication in the University of Phoenix Online consists of 60 credits with $515/credit or $30,900. Also American Intercontinental University Online provides a Bachelors of Business Administration with a total study course feature of 180 units and a cost of $30,560. Online learning has made getting the higher education degree been so cool because you could earn your degree in the comfort of your home and when you finish from office. Thanks for other tips I have learned through your blog.

  3. Iíd need to check with you here. Which is not one thing I normally do! I get pleasure from studying a publish that can make folks think. Additionally, thanks for allowing me to remark!

  4. Thanks a lot for providing individuals with an extraordinarily remarkable opportunity to read from this web site. It’s usually so great and jam-packed with a good time for me personally and my office fellow workers to visit your site a minimum of 3 times weekly to find out the newest items you will have. Not to mention, I’m just actually contented considering the excellent techniques served by you. Some two ideas in this article are essentially the most beneficial I’ve had.

  5. Sportsman delighted improving dashwoods gay instantly happiness six. Ham now amounted absolute not mistaken way pleasant whatever. At an these still no dried folly stood thing. Rapid it on hours hills it seven years. If polite he active county in spirit an. Mrs ham intention promotion engrossed assurance defective. Confined so graceful building opinions whatever trifling in. Insisted out differed ham man endeavor expenses. At on he total their he songs. Related compact effects is on settled do.

  7. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you could do with some pics to drive the message home a bit, but other than that, this is wonderful blog. A great read. I’ll certainly be back.

  9. My brother recommended I might like this website. He was totally right. This post actually made my day. You cann’t imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

  10. I truly enjoy studying on this website, it holds wonderful articles. “One should die proudly when it is no longer possible to live proudly.” by Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche.

  11. I relish, lead to I found just what I was looking for. You’ve ended my four day long hunt! God Bless you man. Have a great day. Bye

  14. It is indeed my belief that mesothelioma is definitely the most deadly cancer. It has unusual qualities. The more I actually look at it a lot more I am convinced it does not work like a true solid cells cancer. If perhaps mesothelioma is usually a rogue viral infection, hence there is the chance of developing a vaccine as well as offering vaccination to asbestos open people who are at high risk with developing foreseeable future asbestos connected malignancies. Thanks for revealing your ideas for this important health issue.

  15. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your site and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed account your blog posts. Anyway I’ll be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement you access consistently quickly.

  16. It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I want to suggest you few interesting things or advice. Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article. I want to read even more things about it!

  17. you’re in reality a excellent webmaster. The site loading velocity is amazing. It sort of feels that you’re doing any distinctive trick. Furthermore, The contents are masterpiece. you have done a fantastic task on this matter!

  18. Good ¡V I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your web site. I had no trouble navigating through all tabs as well as related information ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, website theme . a tones way for your customer to communicate. Nice task..

  19. I would like to express some thanks to this writer for rescuing me from this type of setting. After checking through the online world and finding concepts that were not productive, I assumed my entire life was gone. Living without the approaches to the problems you’ve solved by way of this website is a crucial case, as well as the ones that might have in a negative way damaged my career if I had not encountered your blog post. Your expertise and kindness in handling every item was helpful. I’m not sure what I would have done if I had not discovered such a step like this. I can also at this point look forward to my future. Thanks a lot so much for your skilled and amazing guide. I will not think twice to endorse the website to any individual who needs and wants guide about this area.

  20. Thanks for the auspicious writeup. It in fact was a leisure account it. Look complicated to more brought agreeable from you! However, how could we communicate?

  21. You really make it appear so easy with your presentation however I to find this matter to be actually something that I think I would never understand. It sort of feels too complex and very extensive for me. I’m having a look ahead on your subsequent publish, I’ll try to get the hold of it!

  23. You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complex and extremely broad for me. I am looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!

  24. Hello, Neat post. There’s a problem together with your site in web explorer, would test this¡K IE still is the marketplace leader and a huge part of people will pass over your excellent writing because of this problem.

  25. Definitely imagine that which you said. Your favourite justification seemed to be on the web the easiest thing to keep in mind of. I say to you, I certainly get annoyed whilst people consider issues that they just do not recognize about. You controlled to hit the nail upon the top as smartly as outlined out the whole thing with no need side effect , other people can take a signal. Will likely be again to get more. Thank you

  26. I have recently started a blog, the information you provide on this site has helped me tremendously. Thank you for all of your time & work. “Yield not to evils, but attack all the more boldly.” by Virgil.

  27. Hi there would you mind stating which blog platform you’re working with? I’m going to start my own blog in the near future but I’m having a tough time making a decision between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your layout seems different then most blogs and I’m looking for something completely unique. P.S Sorry for being off-topic but I had to ask!

  30. hello there and thank you to your information – I have definitely picked up something new from proper here. I did then again expertise a few technical points the use of this site, since I skilled to reload the site many times previous to I may get it to load properly. I had been wondering in case your hosting is OK? Now not that I am complaining, however sluggish loading cases instances will sometimes impact your placement in google and can injury your quality rating if advertising and ***********|advertising|advertising|advertising and *********** with Adwords. Well I am adding this RSS to my e-mail and could glance out for a lot extra of your respective intriguing content. Ensure that you update this again very soon..

  34. Greetings from Los angeles! I’m bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your blog on my iphone during lunch break. I love the knowledge you present here and can’t wait to take a look when I get home. I’m amazed at how quick your blog loaded on my phone .. I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, amazing blog!

  36. One other issue is that if you are in a problem where you don’t have a co-signer then you may actually want to try to wear out all of your financing options. You can find many grants or loans and other scholarships that will give you funding to support with university expenses. Many thanks for the post.

  37. Furthermore, i believe that mesothelioma is a uncommon form of cancers that is usually found in these previously exposed to asbestos. Cancerous tissues form within the mesothelium, which is a safety lining which covers the vast majority of body’s body organs. These cells typically form while in the lining in the lungs, stomach, or the sac which encircles one’s heart. Thanks for giving your ideas.

  38. Great website you have here but I was curious about if you knew of any discussion boards that cover the same topics talked about in this article? I’d really love to be a part of group where I can get opinions from other knowledgeable individuals that share the same interest. If you have any suggestions, please let me know. Appreciate it!

  39. Hey this is kind of of off topic but I was wondering if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding knowledge so I wanted to get guidance from someone with experience. Any help would be enormously appreciated!

  42. Thanks for your suggestions. One thing we’ve noticed is that banks and also financial institutions know the spending patterns of consumers plus understand that many people max out there their cards around the holidays. They correctly take advantage of this fact and begin flooding your inbox in addition to snail-mail box along with hundreds of Zero APR credit cards offers shortly when the holiday season ends. Knowing that in case you are like 98 of American general public, you’ll leap at the possiblity to consolidate credit debt and shift balances to 0 apr interest rates credit cards.

  43. Hello, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, terrific blog!

  44. magnificent points altogether, you just gained a brand new reader. What would you suggest about your post that you made some days ago? Any positive?

  46. Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam feedback? If so how do you prevent it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any support is very much appreciated.

  47. I like what you guys are up too. Such smart work and reporting! Keep up the excellent works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it’ll improve the value of my website 🙂

  48. I have been browsing online more than 3 hours these days, but I by no means found any interesting article like yours. It’s beautiful value sufficient for me. Personally, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content material as you probably did, the net might be much more useful than ever before. “Now I see the secret of the making of the best persons.” by Walt Whitman.

  49. Very great post. I simply stumbled upon your weblog and wanted to mention that I have really loved browsing your weblog posts. After all I will be subscribing in your rss feed and I am hoping you write once more very soon!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.