Only Marshall can make beauty out of violence

♫ Just gonna stand there and watch me burn ♫

♫ That’s alright because I like the way it hurts ♫

♫ Just gonna stand there and hear me cry ♫

♫ That’s alright because I love the way you lie ♫

I bumped into this song in a very interesting way. I was having a chat with a very special person, who just happens to be an ex Mr 3CB. We have the same taste in music, so he’s always sending me songs and stuff. Today, he sent me three suggestions. The second song was Beautiful from Relapse, and the third was a song about nonpoints and bullets which made me giggle for a really long time, though I’m still not sure why. I didn’t much like the Relapse song. Too much jazz. But I’ve been playing this one non-stop. The count is at 55.

At first, I wasn’t sure just what I liked. I’ve had the song on my iTunes for months, but I didn’t pay much attention. I mean really … Eminem featuring Rihanna? How now? I glanced at the song info and skipped it more than once. It took Sailor to make me sit up and listen, and only because he has good taste.

When I heard Rihanna whining in the beginning, I was like wtf? But then her voice dies off suddenly and I’m like hmm, this could be interesting. When the beat began, I thought, ‘Hmm, catchy’. Then I started to listen to the words and I was gone. First, it has Em’s trademark rhyming. I just love the way he uses enjambment. Or, maybe it was caesura.

[Disclaimer: I had to Google that one. I know the technique from Mr Murimi and Lit 101, but I couldn’t remember the terms. I suck at details.]

Enjambment is when you stop a sentence in poetry [or rap] partway, to create rhyme and rhythm. Caesura is when you do the same with sound. I think.

High off of love, drunk from my hate

♫ It’s like I’m huffing pain and I love it the more I suffer, I suffocate ♫

♫ And right before I’m about to drown, she resuscitates ♫

♫ me. She fucking hates me and I love it. Wait! ♫

Where you going? ‘I’m leaving you.’ No you ain’t

Come back we’re running right back. Here we go again.

I just love the way he rhymes words that don’t rhyme. I like the tricky word play and the little puns you have to scrutinize to get. Stuff like huffing pain[t].

Of course it helps that the subject is deep, and that it’s handled so uniquely. It helps a lot more that the instrumentals are so awesome. I did more than my fair share of air strings – or whatevere it is they’re using to get the basso profundo. Is that what it was called? That effect where there’s a constant droning bass line? It might have been basso ostinato, I forget.

Anyway, this song clearly moved me. I tweeted about it for well over an hour, and I’m still OCD-ing as we speak. There’s something magical about the way some songs grab me, shake me, and won’t let me go. I’m just a little concerned that lately, a large number are done by Eminem.

There’s a part 2 to this song and I hunted it down on Twitter. It’s not as good as the original, though Em’s verse is amazing, and the song has some pretty serious drums. I thought about it more, whether this is really love, this furious, angstious dependency. It’s powerful and unhealthy, but you can’t deny its passion. I don’t think I want a ‘love’ like that. It makes you feel alive, but it can kill you too.

Either way, I’d still like to buy Marshall tea and pick that brain of his. As long as he doesn’t go Mariah on me. I’m just saying.

Love the way you lie Eminem featuring Rihanna

Forty carats

I suppose I’ve always been a cougar. I remember having crushes on my little brother’s classmates, and that was years ago. In all fairness, the classmate in question was 5 feet tall, half German, and had  a name like a movie star. He was 7, and I was … not.

I told a good friend about my … fetish … and she suggested I was looking for someone to mother. Strange, because I already have a baby, and I’m not very motherly. I’m sure there’s some freudian theory involved, but I don’t think about it too much. Between the purple hair, the pierced nose, the perpetual jeans, and the backpack, I can pass for a college kid, so the age of my dates is not a big deal.

This does backfire, however, when I have to go for parent’s day.

Anyway, a few nights ago, I was preparing for a birthday party, and after spending the whole day cooking and cleaning, I had a chronic backache and a bad case of the dizzies. I settled on the sofa to eat and bumped into a TCM movie. I was looking for the title, but I missed the beginning, and all I could remember were the characters. Yay Google!

The name of the movie is 40 Carats. It’s about a forty year old girl liking a 22 year old boy, and it was made in 1973. I liked the movie because it was sentimental and sweet, and because it dealt with a lot of my issues. Plus, it had a happy ending.

A lot of things stood out for me. Anne, the leading lady, has an interesting relationship with her ex. They’re like best friends – well – sort of. He constantly asks her for money, which she gives him. That part is kind of weird. He hardly knows their 17 year old daughter, is adored by his ex mum-in-law, and he flirts constantly, with everyone. But the subject is handled with humour, so you laugh about it instead of cursing him out.

They’re comfortable enough to talk about their dates, and he comes by her house and rubs her feet. He even encourages her to marry, even though he clearly still has feelings for her. He wants her to be happy. But again, the movie has light, workable scenes. None of that Bold & Beautiful drama that would make it all sappy.

I was looking at Billy and Anne, in that scene where they’re on the sofa, and her legs are on his knees, and they’re talking about her date with JD. I kept wondering if I’d be quite as cosy with an ex. I only have one ex that I consider a friend … and we cordially talk about my current … but I don’t think I’d let him into my bedroom. That would be, you know, weird. Still, the fact that I finally have an ex who’s a friend does mean I’m growing up, no?

As I watched scenes between Anne and Billy, I noticed that they were pals. They were comfortable together. I wondered why they split up in the first place. Maybe years from now, when I’m forty, I’ll be just as close with this ex, and maybe we’ll wonder why we broke up as well.

Sometimes, when we talk, I wonder if he misses me, or if he wishes we hadn’t broken up. As for me, I don’t wonder. I know exactly what went wrong, and I’m glad, because I’m in a happier place now. I’m seeing someone who makes me happy, and I’ve never been this comfortable with anyone. He’s immensely easy to be with, and it feels pretty awesome.

I’m glad that the ex and I are friends though. Maybe one day, when I’m all grown up, I’ll be friends with all my exes. It makes life a lot easier.

In the movie, there’s a scene where Peter [the 22 year old] takes Anne [the 40 year old] to a party with his friends. It’s a swing-ish party, lots of nubile, half-clad women, and they’re largely all over the boy. One even tells Anne ‘You’re getting the best here. He’s like WOW!’ I admit it, I squirmed on her behalf. If some goddess half my age walked up to me and complimented my date’s bedroom skills … well, let’s just say extreme scariness would ensue. Logic suggests that the guy is with you, not the complimenter, but really, when you’ve got Halle Berry standing in front of you praising your man’s … assets … logic isn’t really what comes to mind.

In other news, there’s a DSTV offer where you can get a 6 month subscription plus installation for Ksh 10,000. I’ve always wanted to have TCM on demand, so I was looking through the packages.  The cheaper ones don’t have any good channels, and if I want the History Channel, I have to buy the full 6K package. Oh well. I guess I’ll just have to stick with after hours. It was a fun idea while it lasted.

Grenade Bruno Mars

Scott Pilgrim Vs The World

When Mr 3CB told me the premise for this movie, I thought hmm … okay … so what can be so cool about a movie where you already know the ending? I mean, it’s Scott Pilgrim Vs The World. If The World had won, there wouldn’t be a movie, right?

But my Mr loved the movie, and I mostly trust his opinion. The movie starts with some ol’ school sound effects from Super Mario or something, and that really caught my attention. And then:

Not so long ago, in the mysterious land of Toronto, Canada, Scott Pilgrim was dating a High Schooler.

The little voice outside my head tapped Mr 3CB and said ‘Oh, I am so going to like this movie.” There were comic book captions with descriptions of the characters. They transitioned the scenes too. Interesting.

But about 5 minutes into the movie, the band plays. Their name is Sex Bomb Omb, and they were a lot better than I expected. That’s when I officially decided I like the movie.

Wait. I lie. I decided I liked the movie when I read the captions ‘Knives Chau – 17 years old’ and ‘Young Neil – 20 years old – lives here.’


The story is basically this. Scott meets the girl of his dreams, but in order to win her over, he has to defeat her seven evil exes. Also involved are Goth girls, ninjas, vegans, purple hair, and some really good bass.

It’s pretty safe to say I liked this movie. It had  some cool effects, and throwbacks to old 8 bit videogames. Plus the geek guy kicks ass, which is a nice surprise. Very anti-cliché. Did I mention purple hair?

I like this film because it’s kind of silly, and kind of romantic, and kind of awesome. I question the leading boy’s taste, but it’s his lovelife, so yeah. Personally, I’d go with Knives, or Kim. Natalie and Ramona are kind of … you know … bad.

My favourite lines in the movie are:

Scott: … what’s the website for that?

Wallace: … …?!

My second favourite is by Scott’s sister, I forget her name.

Wallace! Again?!

You have to watch the film to understand. Wallace is my personal favourite by the way. Kim is a close second.

Others beautiful lines include:

Did you know Pacman was originally called Puckman? They changed the name because they were worried people would change the P to F … I’ll leave you alone forever now.


Hey Comeau, you know everyone, right? Do you know this one girl with hair like this?

Not forgetting:

We are Sex Bomb Omb and we’re here to make you think about death and get sad and stuff!

I think the coolest part in the movie comes about 30 minutes after it starts:

This song is called ‘I am so sad. I am so very, very sad.’ It goes a little something like this …  ♫ *drums*guitars* ♫ sooooo sad! ♫ Thank you.

At that point, I *dead* went to funny-bone heaven, and came back to earth to *dead* again. You can forget about the buried part. That part of the movie will forever be etched in funny-bone history. I shall replay until the files gets scratched, then I’ll fix it with a patch and play it again. If you ever see me crying as I silently giggle myself to death, it will be because of that part of the movie.

I liked this movie so much that I watched it two days in a  row, Totally worth it. I hear they made it an 8-bit videogame, and that there are comic books too. I’m not so much a comic book fan, but for this, I’ll make an exception. Plus, I finally have an excuse to break out the joysticks, so hurray for Scott Pilgrim!

That is all.

Katanayagis Twins AttackSex Bomb Omb

Did you know Pacman was originally called Puckman? They changed the name because they were worried people would change the P to F … I’ll leave you alone forever now.