Posted on by crystal · 110 Comments

Sometimes I wish I was dumb

I just finished watching a documentary on Shangri-La tea caravans, and I took about a million different lessons thanks to my capacity for overthinking. But what I feel the most is pity. Pity for my intellectualism.

When you’re a smart, educated person, you base life on philosophies, daydreams, and logic. You want to see the world, to change the world. You want to make a difference. The people on the caravan travel for 6 months at a time, so they definitely see the world. They trade goods from far places, spreading cultures as they go, so they do make a difference. But for the most part, they don’t see themselves as Plato. They’re living their lives, doing their jobs, and that’s more than enough for them.

In one of the towns along the route, there is a centre where salt wells are dug. Holes are drilled into the mountainside and ladders are slipped into the salty water beneath. Women climb down the ladders, fill their barrels with salt water, then climb back out again. They carry the barrels up 20 km of uphill roads, pour the water in a drying pan, and go back to the well.

Each barrel of water weighs 15 kg, and they carry up to 12 barrels a day. Since the women live 5 km from the wells, they work from 4.00 a.m. to 7.00 p.m. The men stay home and take care of the farming, building, trading … and household chores.

As I watched those women walking up and down those hills with water on their backs, I felt sorry. I wasn’t sorry for them. I was sorry for me. The women looked so happy, like they were actually enjoying themselves. They laughed as they trudged along with their backs all bent, and their workclothes were bright and cheerful.

I envy them. That has to be the most boring job in the world, carrying heavy water up and down and up and down and up and down, all day, every day. Exhausting too. I don’t know how they do it. Yet they were happy. From what I could see, boredom wasn’t in their vocabulary. They just get up, work, eat, sleep.

For an ‘educated’ person like me, it seems like a waste, like an existence instead of a life. It seems like they could be doing so much more. But while I sit here with my thoughts and my depth and my philosophy, looking for motivation to work today, convincing myself to write instead of watching TV, I can’t help thinking they’re lucky. I can’t help wishing I had a mind frame as simple as theirs, a thought process that’s happy to walk, carry water, eat and sleep.

Some people would say that without the ‘brains’ of the world, we wouldn’t have books, electricity, ice cream, BMW. But these Tibetans seem to be doing just fine without them. I don’t know if there are kids born in that world who feel imprisoned, who long to be free, to fly planes, hold scalpels, to ditch the paycheque and watch Ben 10 instead. I sure didn’t see any on my screen.

Looking at those men and women, I think it’s them that are smart, not me. Their level of intellect is different from mine. Their genius is keyed on survival, and they don’t lose time with ideas and grand schemes. They simply survive, and they thrive. In an evolutionary chart, they’d be miles ahead of me, going and growing while I shrivelled in the hunger of ‘deep thinking’.

I wish I was more like that. I wish I didn’t have to rationalize work and have endless debates about whether or not I should force motivation or wait for inspiration. And the best part is, I wouldn’t even have to do  housework!

♫ Mad season ♫ Matchbox Twenty ♫

Posted on by crystal · 9 Comments

Creating my own success

I read an article this morning that explained why I’ve been feeling so down. I’ve been ungrateful for my career because despite having my dream job, I still feel bored, and it’s driving me crazy! Or at least, it was, before I read the article.

Steve Errey did a guest post on Men With Pens. He explained that people aren’t successful because they use the wrong measures for success, so when they get what they want, they still feel like a failure. To quote him:

Far too many people fail to create their own definition of success. Instead, they chase an idea they’ve patched together from what they’ve read, observed, or think they should be aiming for. They go after the wrong kind of success and wonder why it feels hollow when they get there.

As an example, Steve listed some common misguided reasons why people start their own businesses:

  1. To blow other people away with what you’ve built
  2. To earn yourself some great money
  3. To impress your peers
  4. To bring about a better lifestyle
  5. To be your own boss
  6. To work on your own terms
  7. To feel successful; to feel like you’ve “made it”
  8. To finish it, because you already decided to build it
  9. To take vacation time when you want
  10. To be respected by your peers, mentors, family and friends

I admit I agree with almost everything on that list. It’s why I quit my job to write! And even Steve admits they’re pretty good reasons. They’re just not working reasons, which is why you’re still unfulfilled once you get them.

I love to write, and I love that I’m paid to do it. So I looked at the list and realised that all I need is a shift in perspective. Steve says you can only be successful in your work if you do it for love. If you work because you love it, then every moment of work is a success, and you won’t think about how much you make. Well, you won’t think of it much.

So back to that list:

  • 1. To blow other people away with what you’ve built

I don’t say it often, but I have a bit of a chip o my shoulder. I took a  break from college to have my baby, and I didn’t get round to going back. I’d still like to finish my degree some time, if only to hear the silly song, wear the silly hat, turn the silly ribbon, and throw it in the air like they do in the movies. A lot of people put me down for not having a degree, and my former employer threatened me with it whenever I asked for a raise or better contract. So a key reason I started freelancing was to prove a point, to show them I could do it. Well guess what, I did it. Still not happy. But … if I focus on just writing instead of the weight on my shoulders, I still come out smiling.

  • 2. To earn yourself some great money

Duh! But I’ve noticed money isn’t everything. I’ve earned half a mill this year and none of it is in the bank, so I need more motivation. Dollars and cents aren’t cutting it. I actually have more fun working for free. When I’m doing a client project, I need a Twitter break every three minutes. But when I’m writing on my blog, here, here, or here, I’m in the zone for hours before I know what time it is. A post takes me an hour or two, sometimes three, but I never notice how long I’m at it. Again, it’s all in the love of writing.

  • 3. To impress your peers

Refer to 1. Also, some people get really jazzed when you tell them you work from home. It makes them jealous, and makes you sound really, really cool. Of course, unless you love the work, you spend all day answering emails while convincing yourself that you’re ‘housekeeping’. Love your work and you’ll do it anywhere – in the office, in your bedroom, or on the roof of a really tall building … while it’s raining.

  • 4. To bring about a better lifestyle

You can do this with any job if you just earn enough. A good job means good money, which means buying stuff, which means a better lifestyle, right? Except your lifestyle isn’t fun if you’re unhappy all the time. You have to really love what you do, or the money won’t help. You could also say it gives you time for gym, or for being with your kids, but it’s back to love. If you hate fitness or TV, then there’s no point in having more time to indulge in them. A good lifestyle means finding joy in all you do, and yes, there’s a lot of joy in typing words that make people laugh, even when describing something as boring as linen sheets.

  • 5. To be your own boss

First, there’s no such thing as being your own boss, period. Your client is your boss, double period. Also, surprisingly, having no one to stand over you sometimes means no work. With a salaried job, you’re always afraid you’ll get fired, so you work even when you don’t want to. You would that in freelancing, the threat of sleeping hungry would drive self-employers to work more. But you’d be surprised how long you can last with TV, closed curtains and a locked door. For me, it’s fun knowing I don’t have to dress up for work. I wake up, send baby girl to school, hit the gym, have a shower, get back into pyjamas, cross my legs, then sit at my computer and write until she gets home. Or until I get hungry, whichever comes first. That’s way more fun than sneaking in late when my boss isn’t looking.

  • 6. To work on your own terms

This is a pretty good reason, and I love it. But still, refer to Number 6. Sometimes when no one is pushing you, nothing gets done. You have to love your work, and like Mr 3CB says, if it was easy to do, it wouldn’t be called work. Still, it’s a lot of fun knowing I don’t have to minimise my tweets, work around VLC, or whisper when my favourite song comes on.

  • 7.  To feel successful; to feel like you’ve “made it”

Totally overrated. Once you make it, what do you do next? Find something new to ‘make’? Unless you love what you do enough to keep doing it, you’ll just jump from one project to the next, and you can only jump so long before your knees give out. By getting this job, I’ve more than made it. But for me to stay in this job, I have to remember that I love it, because I’m not very good at double dutch.

  • 8. To finish it, because you already decided to build it

Luckily for me, I don’t have this problem with work. I sometimes have it with other things, because I stick with lame decisions just so I won’t have to admit I changed my mind…

  • 9. To take vacation time when you want

Er … actually … no, you can’t.

  • 10. To be respected by your peers, mentors, family and friends

Refer to … well … refer to all the odd numbers on this list. I suspect there’s a reason why they’re odd. It’s kharma.

So basically, I started out the day feeling bored, discovered the reason why I’m bored, learnt a way to fix it, and realised I had the right tools all along. I just had to move to the left, tilt my head slightly, and see things a little different. Thanks Steve, you rock.

♫ Sky ♫ Sonique ♫

Posted on by crystal · 11 Comments

Luck vs presentation: Celebrating Pointblank

I like nice people. I know the world isn’t full of them, and they mostly have no place in business, but I like nice people. Be nice to me and I’ll probably buy your product, even if it’s slightly sucky. Lie to me, and your business is history as far as I’m concerned. And last week, I put this into practice in a very curious way.

I was looking for Bouncy Castles, so I Googled ‘Bouncy Castles in Nairobi’ and ended up on this page. I skimmed and realised the prices were basically the same, so I looked for other methods to sift the wheat from the chaff. My first concern was contacts. They all listed phone numbers … and hotmail/yahoo addresses. Not good. I next checked for websites. Nada. I looked for anything else that would catch my attention – a pretty name, descriptive info, a dancing turkey, anything to give me a sign. Nothing doing. So I dialled the first number on the list. I figured if I didn’t like it, I’d inky-pinky-pon-key, or maybe just call them all.

The phone rung like ten times before it was answered, and I came that close to hanging up. When the guy finally picked up, he was professional and courteous. I asked lots of questions and he answered every one. I was going to ask where his office was, to see whether I could get a closer provider, but then he offered me a discount, which pretty much sealed the deal. I really like this guy.

The lesson here is that people will tryout the first service they see, so you need to be visible. If you’re on any list, you should be at the top. When your client drives by, make your pitch so good that they don’t want second opinions.

I needed an artist too, and after a bunch of great coincidences, I got two names. I thought I’d call them both, but instincts said to try the second name first, so I did. He answered his phone promptly and was very well-spoken. I like that. He took all of my questions, answered them immediately, and set up a meeting, though we ended up doing the whole thing online. He even gave me his plan of action and the project started right away. I gave him a deposit through Mpesa and he got to work. Everything was sorted in minutes, and I knew I was getting my money’s worth. I was quite happy with this guy. He has a nice voice, and some Google sleuthing suggests he works in radio …

A few hours later, I figured I should still call the other guy, just in case. I called and explained my project, and he suggested we talk it over on email, which was fine, except I felt a little brushed off. I was glad I’d called the other guy first. Still, I played it to the end, sent an email with my brief and everything. A few hours later, he replied, giving me the first guy’s number. Hurray for intuition!

The results of are phenomenal. He worked fast, he worked well, and I would gladly do a cartwheel for him. Please note that I don’t generally do cartwheels. The project was to build me a Manga character, and as you can see, the resemblance is uncanny. He did this piece too, and it’s truly my favourite.

Ladies and gentlemen, credit where credit is due. If you need animation done, Pointblank is the guy to call. I don’t think he has  a website … [or does he? I didn’t ask] but I can give you his details if you need them. For now, bow at his awesomeness and check him out on Facebook and Twitter. And yes, my hair really is purple – but only in sunlight.