I was at my workmate’s desk, looking at some copy, so I didn’t hear the bump. I saw everyone run to the window, trying to find out what was going on. Some people wondered whether a car had rammed the barrier, and a few theories were thrown around before the resident office grinch yelled that someone had just killed himself.
We thought he was joking, so we went to see for ourselves. The man was lying face down on the pavement. He was moving, so we thought he might still be alive, but someone went and touched him, and told us he was dead. There wasn’t a lot of blood, because nobody had moved him yet. He looked almost asleep, or maybe just passed out.
Some of my workmates went down to take a better look. Some took photos and videos, but were so shaken afterwards that they needed a drink. Others were crying. One person was furious, thinking the man might be a terrorist, while someone else wished he had picked a different building.
The body lay there for a long time. In fact, it’s still lying there. We found out the man’s name, and more people start crying. No one at the office is concentrating right now. They’re shaken. They don’t understand why anyone would want to take their own life. But I do, because I’ve been there. More than once.
My workmate is shocked that I look so … serene. I don’t know if that’s the right word. Right now, what I feel is … nothing. I understand that a man is dead, and that people are upset, and angry, and terrified, but I don’t feel much of anything.
The suicide itself isn’t a shock to me. I’m more bemused by the reactions of everyone else. I’ve always thought suicide is the business of the person who died, and to some extent, his loved ones. So I find it odd that acquaintances are so vested in it. There are very heated discussions around me right now, all about why no one should kill themselves. I guess self-inflicted death affects more people than I thought it did.
I considered taking a closer look at the body. I’ve heard people say suicide victims are deluded and that they think death is heroic and easy. My favourite ex described death to me in vivid detail once. He’s in the military, so he’s seen a lot of it first hand, and he was trying to shock me out of a suicidal stupor. It didn’t really work, so he broke up with me instead. He said he didn’t want to be around the next time I tried something that stupid.
Today, I thought maybe if I saw how terrible that body looked today, it would stay in my mind and snap me out of my next depression. But I couldn’t make myself do it. It just felt … wrong somehow. I felt that looking at him just to soothe my demons would be disrespectful. So when the ambulance finally came and turned him over, I didn’t look.
It’s been over an hour, but some of the people in the office are still shaky and teary-eyed. I find that strange. I suppose the average human loves life, and that seeing someone throw theirs away is disturbing. For me, it’s not death itself that stops me, it’s the fear of what would happen to my baby girl once I was gone. The thought of her sorrow, confusion, and tears keeps me from doing anything stupid. I don’t know what drove that man off our office building, but I hope that wherever he is, his soul is at peace.
I have been silently reading your blog for the last two years, this post forced me out of the shadows. I have been moved by your sad stories and celebrated when you emerged from the darkness. Don’t let yourself go back there, focus on your lovely daughter not the dark thoughts. Trust me people who contemplate suicide don’t know the damage to those they leave behind, the hurt, the anger, the guilt that never goes away… Don’t burden your daughter with this
@Lulu I’ve had a lot of people get mad at me, and I always wondered why since it was my life I was taking. But you’re right, I won’t put anyone through that again.
thaitrade scam thailand ebay scam top 10 scam in thailand sapphire scam bangkok
scam a4 paper thailand https://siam-shipping.com/
Neat blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download
it from somewhere? A theme like yours with a few simple tweeks
would really make my blog jump out. Please let me know where you got your theme.
Bless you
This design is spectacular! You certainly know how to keep a
reader amused. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job.
I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how
you presented it. Too cool!
Why users still make use of to read news papers when in this technological
world all is available on web?
Hi, I think your website might be having
browser compatibility issues. When I look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer,
it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
Other then that, great blog!
Actually no matter if someone doesn’t be aware of after that its up to other visitors
that they will help, so here it occurs.
My brother recommended I may like this web site.
He was totally right. This publish truly made my day. You cann’t
imagine just how much time I had spent for this info! Thanks!
Thanks for another informative blog. Where else could I am getting that type of info written in such a
perfect means? I’ve a challenge that I am simply now working on, and I have been at
the look out for such info.
I just want to tell you that I am just new to blogging and certainly enjoyed you’re web page. Most likely I’m want to bookmark your website . You amazingly come with perfect stories. Many thanks for sharing your web site.
Hi to all, it’s in fact a nice for me to
visit this web site, it contains useful Information.
I believe that avoiding packaged foods will be the first step for you to lose weight. They will often taste fine, but packaged foods include very little nutritional value, making you consume more simply to have enough electricity to get throughout the day. For anyone who is constantly eating these foods, changing to cereals and other complex carbohydrates will aid you to have more power while consuming less. Great blog post.
Hello very nice web site!! Man .. Beautiful .. Wonderful .. I’ll bookmark your website and take the feeds also…I am happy to search out a lot of useful info here in the put up, we need develop more strategies on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .
I believe that avoiding refined foods will be the first step for you to lose weight. They will taste beneficial, but refined foods currently have very little vitamins and minerals, making you feed on more in order to have enough electricity to get throughout the day. When you are constantly feeding on these foods, changing to cereals and other complex carbohydrates will help you to have more vitality while consuming less. Great blog post.
Thanks for your post right here. One thing I would like to say is the fact most professional career fields consider the Bachelors Degree like thejust like the entry level requirement for an online course. While Associate Diplomas are a great way to start out, completing ones Bachelors opens up many doorways to various employment opportunities, there are numerous internet Bachelor Diploma Programs available coming from institutions like The University of Phoenix, Intercontinental University Online and Kaplan. Another issue is that many brick and mortar institutions present Online types of their qualifications but commonly for a drastically higher payment than the corporations that specialize in online college degree programs.
Hi, Neat post. There is a problem with your website in internet explorer, would check this… IE still is the market leader and a large portion of people will miss your fantastic writing because of this problem.
Very interesting information!Perfect just what I was looking for! “It is our choices…that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” by J. K. Rowling.
I loved as much as you’ll receive carried out right here. The sketch is tasteful, your authored material stylish. nonetheless, you command get bought an nervousness over that you wish be delivering the following. unwell unquestionably come more formerly again as exactly the same nearly a lot often inside case you shield this increase.
obviously like your website however you need to check the spelling on quite a few of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very troublesome to inform the truth nevertheless I’ll surely come back again.
I like what you guys are up also. Such intelligent work and reporting! Carry on the superb works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it will improve the value of my web site :).
Thanks for this article. I might also like to talk about the fact that it can end up being hard if you are in school and starting out to initiate a long credit score. There are many scholars who are just simply trying to endure and have long or beneficial credit history can sometimes be a difficult issue to have.
Very good article. I will be going through some of these
issues as well..
It¡¦s in reality a great and useful piece of info. I am satisfied that you just shared this helpful info with us. Please keep us up to date like this. Thank you for sharing.
Simply a smiling visitor here to share the love (:, btw outstanding layout. “Reading well is one of the great pleasures that solitude can afford you.” by Harold Bloom.
Appreciate this post. Let me try it out.
Yet another thing to mention is that an online business administration study course is designed for learners to be able to smoothly proceed to bachelor degree courses. The Ninety credit college degree meets the lower bachelor college degree requirements when you earn your own associate of arts in BA online, you should have access to the modern technologies in such a field. Several reasons why students have to get their associate degree in business is because they may be interested in the field and want to get the general training necessary previous to jumping right into a bachelor college diploma program. Many thanks for the tips you actually provide in your blog.
Does your site have a contact page? I’m having problems locating it but, I’d like to shoot you an e-mail. I’ve got some ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it improve over time.
whoah this blog is great i love reading your posts. Keep up the good work! You know, many people are searching around for this information, you could aid them greatly.
Together with the whole thing that seems to be building within this particular subject material, many of your viewpoints happen to be rather radical. Having said that, I am sorry, but I can not subscribe to your entire suggestion, all be it radical none the less. It seems to everyone that your remarks are not completely validated and in actuality you are your self not even totally confident of the assertion. In any event I did appreciate reading through it.
I do agree with all the ideas you have presented in your post. They’re very convincing and will definitely work. Still, the posts are too short for beginners. Could you please extend them a little from next time? Thanks for the post.
But wanna remark on few general things, The website design and style is perfect, the subject material is real good. “Art for art’s sake makes no more sense than gin for gin’s sake.” by W. Somerset Maugham.
I like what you guys are up also. Such intelligent work and reporting! Keep up the excellent works guys I have incorporated you guys to my blogroll. I think it’ll improve the value of my web site 🙂
Thanks for each of your efforts on this web page. Kim enjoys conducting investigations and it’s obvious why. Most people learn all about the dynamic means you deliver both interesting and useful strategies through your website and even boost response from some other people about this theme so our girl is undoubtedly learning a lot. Have fun with the rest of the new year. You have been doing a pretty cool job.
I’m really loving the theme/design of your site. Do you ever run into any internet browser compatibility issues? A small number of my blog readers have complained about my blog not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Chrome. Do you have any solutions to help fix this problem?
I will immediately snatch your rss as I can not in finding your e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Kindly let me recognize in order that I may subscribe. Thanks.
Thanks for your article on the vacation industry. I might also like contribute that if you are a senior thinking of traveling, its absolutely important to buy travel cover for golden-agers. When traveling, older persons are at high risk of getting a health emergency. Obtaining the right insurance cover package for one’s age group can protect your health and give you peace of mind.
Good write-up, I¡¦m normal visitor of one¡¦s blog, maintain up the nice operate, and It is going to be a regular visitor for a long time.
I was just seeking this information for some time. After 6 hours of continuous Googleing, finally I got it in your site. I wonder what is the lack of Google strategy that don’t rank this type of informative websites in top of the list. Usually the top web sites are full of garbage.
Great awesome things here. I am very happy to look your article. Thanks a lot and i am taking a look forward to contact you. Will you kindly drop me a e-mail?
I simply needed to appreciate you once again. I’m not certain what I might have made to happen in the absence of the entire ways shown by you directly on such a field. It previously was an absolute hard scenario in my circumstances, nevertheless viewing a new specialized fashion you resolved the issue forced me to cry with delight. Now i am grateful for this support as well as have high hopes you comprehend what an amazing job you are carrying out instructing the rest using your web blog. Most probably you haven’t encountered any of us.
Whats up very nice blog!! Man .. Excellent .. Wonderful .. I will bookmark your site and take the feeds also…I am satisfied to search out so many useful info here within the publish, we want develop more techniques on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .
Hey There. I found your blog using msn. This is a very well written article. I will make sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post. I’ll certainly return.
Hey! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any problems with hackers? My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing several weeks of hard work due to no data backup. Do you have any solutions to stop hackers?
Good – I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your web site. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs as well as related info ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Quite unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, site theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Nice task.
magnificent publish, very informative. I’m wondering why the opposite specialists of this sector don’t notice this. You must continue your writing. I’m sure, you have a great readers’ base already!
I really enjoy looking at on this site, it contains wonderful content. “Beware lest in your anxiety to avoid war you obtain a master.” by Demosthenes.
I was reading through some of your articles on this site and I conceive this website is real instructive! Keep on putting up.
I have been absent for a while, but now I remember why I used to love this web site. Thank you, I will try and check back more often. How frequently you update your site?
Hi! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a group of volunteers and starting a new project in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us valuable information to work on. You have done a extraordinary job!